So, what was happening around you?
There is an old poem on parents mind. "Being parent does not mean to have no guide lamp, but the heart to yearn their children covers their guide lamp up".
There is an old proverb saying; "Parents won't be able to know what's wrong with their children"
If you try to give too much and neglect teaching what is necessary for social life and yearn children as their own treasure, you may end up losing them somewhere in the trash.
Being blind with love makes you impossible to help your children out of trash and cannot know the reason why they are trapped. The mother won't tell father what has been happening either. Since father does not know what is happening, there won't be any rigid requirement in their home.
As the result, your children will be unworthy to their parents and end up losing everything their parents acquired.
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This is my case as well. I have inherited ove 40% of stock share what my father had established and made public in 1963. In 1989, I had merged this public corporation with a junk corporation. 10 years later, in 1999, I was chased out from the company and lost other inheritances as well within 5 years since then.
So, I know what is necessary to keep your current asset in safe. 70% of my friends were gone somewhere out from their asset inherited.
Does your home have rigid rule?
In educating community obligation and its requirement, parents must keep rigid attitude where necessary. By being rigid where necessary, children can know that parents can be rigid and realize that they cannot win over parents. As they know it as the reality, they would admire and love their parents.
If you neutralize or cancel whatever you said or done because of your love to them, they will know why and try same thing again and again. As the result they won't respect you in any way and won't give a thought to you.
Your children will behave arrogantly as they grow and won't give a thought to community requirement. You should not give too much care to your children.
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I wanted to have passenger car. That was 1961. Japan was at the entrance of booming economy but it was yet to come. I was learning jazz piano. Yes, that was one of many things that had been realized before I had known it realized.
My pianist teacher introduced me a job at a night club. I was 18 at the time and was not supposed to walk into such places. But I wanted to have a car. Besides, I love playing popular songs on piano very much and was glad to have this chance of earning some with doing what I love.
Two weeks later, mother told me to stop working in the night and said that she pushed father to buy me a car. My goodness! I was glad, of course. Had I stop working? No, no way. I drive up to the club with new car every evening. Now you know what's wrong with me, right?
Do you force child to obey?
It is recommended to start teaching social obligation to your children as they grow. You should not give priority to your love. The social obligation suggests your children that they are the member of community and the requirement to be in various communities.
Earlier you teach them those requirement, the better the result may be. If you give priority to your love as most female does, it is too easy missing teaching the social obligation. Too much love to your children makes you accept whatever your children say or do and lose precious chance to teach the requirement living in society.
As the result, the lack of education on social requirement may ruin the destiny of your children. You'd better start teaching as earlier as possible and have them learn to refrain from own desire.
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Hey, this is difficult. Your kids are cute. Nobody wishes to hurt them. But unless you hurt them and have them train themselves to face the reality, there will never be their success. Why do I say that?
Because I am an example of selfishness in a rich family. Parents were ready to fill my desire. There were lots. Most of them had been realized before I had known it had been realized!


